Having a condition that challenges his masculinity and his power, strength, control and vigour can be devastating. I have worked with many men who have suffered with erectile dysfunction and many have said it is in many ways worse than a marriage break up or losing a job. It impacts on not what they are but who they are. As a woman, I have no equivalent or comparison to arousal, orgasm and penetrative sex being all centred around having a hard penis. I don’t feel my sexual identify is judged on my sexual arousal or the physical structure of my genitals.
For me as a woman these things do not determine my pleasure or my performance. For a man this is very different. Erectile dysfunction challenges men’s masculinity and causes a lot of anxiety, fear and shame. Some men try medical approaches such as Viagra, penile implants or vacuum devices or other more alternative approaches such as hypnosis and acupuncture. These approaches can often be found to alter the stiffness, but don’t address the deeper issues around connection to self, mind-set, behaviour and self-awareness. They don’t address the energy or the cause. From an energy perspective, erectile dysfunction is based around the emotion of guilt and shame and a lack of connection with the penis.
Energetically this can be linked to a number of things.
- Unconscious thoughts and connections relating to childhood.
- Relationships that challenge performance in any area life.
- Relationships that challenge Feeling of being unsuccessful.
- Feeling of weakness, guilt and shame when connecting to feminine qualities
- Feel invalidated as a man.
- Feeling a failure if/when their energy is controlled by the feminine.
- Feeling that they can’t break away from a situation for fear of having no connection.
- Feeling disconnected from being able to express themselves in sex.
- Needs, wants and desires are challenged.
A combination of tantric massage, mindfulness, breath work, energy work and coaching can help change this. As a practitioner I use the Energy Alignment Method and other energy modalities to help people change thoughts and beliefs and tantric massage and mindfulness to help reconnect back to the body. The emotions can be triggered at any time and can detach us from our body and cause dis-ease. These tools explore the energy behind the condition and help change the anatomical make up that causes such physical conditions. If you would like to know more about how Shelki supports men with erectile dysfunction please email: firstname.lastname@example.org